Uuhhh, where were we ?

Daily Prompt: Disastrous

I am in this odd place in my life, I want to see change and I feel like I am making the right moves to get where I want to, but at the same time I feel like I have no control over my own life, a lot of things are happening and my (former) inner control freak is just watching it all happen, without a care in the world.

In a way I am grateful for this phase but at the same time I wonder what it means, because I fear losing my lust for life, the thing that keeps me going. I have so many thoughts and ideas that I want to share with you but because the winds have not directed me there I am finding it so hard to share all of it with you, which is so frustrating because all I crave for is experiences that will intrigue me and entice me enough to want to write a blog post about whatever the experience is, and here they are, here they go, and I still find myself standing, unshaken, why is it so hard for me to make moves that I have already made before, what the hell is happening.

It’s not writers block, I feel like my mind has put my tongue, on mute. The one gift I have, is now threatened and I still feel unmoved, unshaken, I feel sane yet I am surrounded by absolute chaos and insanity.

“I’ve been on the low
I been taking my time
I feel like I’m out of my mind
it feel like my life ain’t mine” – Logic

2c8f6b60e1adc988e160338b1f4891e4--smoke-drawing-smoke-artWhy do I feel at peace when what I know to be life, is threatened and why is it the one moment I let go of all control I have over my own life, it feels like things are falling into place. The only reason why I may be stuck in this phase is because a part of me is content with seeing the pieces of my puzzle just magically fall into place, and I am at peace because I am not constantly trying to figure everything out, it’s figuring itself out.

Is this a trap?

Where am I?

Xoxo, ?

 

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3 thoughts on “Uuhhh, where were we ?

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